Still Daddy's Girl

WeddingsOnline.ie

Just like in a scene from the original black and white movie Father of the Bride, when the father, played by Spencer Tracy, suddenly recognises the emotion he feels about his daughter's wedding ("What's it going to be like to come home and not find her. Not to hear her voice calling 'Hi Pops' as I come in?"), most fathers are very sentimental about their daughter's wedding.

Many see the impending day as the end of an era. After being the number one male figure in your life so far, it is as though he suddenly realises that you are not only leaving home for good, but you are on the way to having your own home. And, perhaps, you will soon be starting a family.

Nostalgic images of your childhood - that shiny red push-bike, the battered teddy-bear you loved - or memories of the time your first boyfriend called to the door, all spin around in his head. He recollects advising you about career choices and lending you money for cars and holidays. Although he knows that this is just one more inevitable step, he can't help feeling a bit melancholy.

The best way to help your Dad is to get him involved as much as possible in bringing your wedding to fruition. Also, have someone gently remind him that he's not losing a daughter, he's gaining a son-in-law and a whole lot more.

To help both you and your dad, we've put together a guide, complete with duties to get him busy. Feel free to print it out and edit it to suit your situation.

Duties for the Father of the Bride
Decide how much you and your wife can and are willing to contribute to the wedding and let your daughter and her husband-to-be know as soon as possible.

When the time comes to prepare the guest list, provide your daughter with the names and addresses of the people you and your wife would like invited.

Help by drawing up a map, with written directions, to the church and reception for inclusion in the invitation.

Be prepared to play taxi driver and collect visiting guests from the airport.

If there are many guests coming from abroad or out of town, help organise hotels and transportation.

Prepare a speech for the wedding dinner and practice, practice, practice.

On the appointed evening, attend the rehearsal.

Pick out your wedding attire.

If there is a rehearsal dinner, you and your wife should attend. Find out if you will be called upon to make a speech and, if so, be prepared.

Ask your daughter if she would like you to escort her down the aisle at the beginning of the wedding ceremony.

Deliver your speech when called upon by the best man.

Dance with your daughter, your wife and your daughter's new mother-in-law.

Be on hand throughout the reception to ensure all is running smoothly.

See to it that every guest has a lift home.

Collect any wedding gifts that are brought to the reception and take them home for safe keeping.

What to Wear
Although there are no strict rules, most dads will want to look as spiffy as possible on the day. The general idea is that a traditional morning suit, tuxedo or frock coat should be worn if the groom and groomsmen are wearing them. Otherwise a stylish day suit, in navy, gray, black, brown or beige, is perfect.

Of course, your overall look will depend on the fit of your suit. When it comes to sizing, make sure your jacket doesn't pull across the front when buttoned, that your shirt peeks out beneath your jacket sleeve, that your trousers sit comfortably on your waist and that they fall gracefully across the tops of your newly shined shoes.

Accessories are an important element in your wedding day attire too and can make all the difference between a "nice" look and a "terrific" one. Decorative buttons, an unusual shirt collar design, a striking vest or vintage cuff links are just a few ways to show off your own personal style. Don't be afraid to express yourself but do be sure to get final approval from your daughter.

 
 
 
 
 
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