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In the enlightened times in which we now find ourselves, the importance of a good guest list cannot be underestimated. As modern life grows increasingly more complicated and nuclear families are becoming a fond memory of the past, couples must give due consideration to the "chosen few" who will be selected as invitees to their nuptials. 

As compared to our parent's generation, there is a lot more scope these days in picking and choosing one's wedding guests. There are, of course, some social conundrums that have remained unchanged - ones that are still guaranteed to fox even the most knowledgeable of etiquette experts. These tend to fall into the gray area of "family issues" and one example might be whether or not you can invite the friends of your darling husband-to-be without jeopardising the moral safety of the unattached females at the wedding? Another could be whether or not to invite Aunt Brenda after the embarrassing incident with the priest and bottle of Baccardi last Christmas. Such have been the minefield of social issues perplexing couples since time immemorial.

To help ease you into this task-of-tasks, keep the following few rules in mind. 

Developing a guest list is something that every couple should do together: this allows both of you to air grievances early on in the proceedings. By all means, take time on your own and with your families to think about whom you wanted invited, but then make time to discuss your thoughts and come to a unanimous decision. Think of the process as a trial run for the happy years of compromise and discussion you have ahead. 

Be aware of the emotional blackmail many relatives may try and play. Weddings are precisely the time that all manner of previously unknown second cousins and great uncles start popping out of the woodwork. You will undoubtedly be expected to invite everyone and it is nigh on impossible to avoid hurting somebody's feelings (unless of course you want to try and go for a Guinness world record in the "largest wedding ever" category). Don't get caught into believing that everyone related to you by birth has to be included. 

Bear in mind the type of wedding you want and who you want to be present. This is your day and you should have your nearest and dearest in attendance. One young Irish couple took the very bold step of flouting convention by making their wedding a "friends only" affair. Apart from their parents and siblings, the guest list was comprised entirely of friends past and present. Initially their decision ruffled a few feathers but in the end it worked out beautifully. 

Lastly, once you've done your best to develop a well thought-out guest list, you are not responsible for the conflict that arises between people on the day. No matter what anyone says to you (and that includes your parents) you are not, for example, accountable for age-old family feuds. Your guests should be adult enough to put aside their differences this one time and partake in the joyous event of your nuptials.